36 hits
"Forget all those health clinics and gyms. Sex is the best cure for everything, especially stress. If I have a good night of sex, all my problems are gone by 10 o' clock in the morning."-- Grace Jones
Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.-- Thomas Jones
Experience allows you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.-- Franklin P. Jones
"Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride worthwile."-- Franklin P. Jones
"Hey, Aeryn's gorgeous--she can change any guy's tune. She can also change 'im from tenor to soprano, but that's beside the point."-- Grace
Children are unpredictable. You never know what inconsistency they're going to catch you in next.-- Franklin P. Jones
"What makes resisting temptation difficult, for many people, is that they don't want to discourage it completely."-- Franklin P. Jones
Education, then, beyond all other devices of human origin, is the great machinery.-- Horace Mann
"The world is a comedy to those who think, a tragedy to those who feel."-- Horace Walpole
Nine-tenths of the people were created so you would want to be with the other tenth.-- Horace Walpole
Sticks and stones may break my bones but whips and chains arouse me.
If the mind were exercised as much as the mouth, we would be a race of geniuses.
Sticks and Stones may break my bones, but so would an 80 pound carrot.
feet and stones may break my bones, but metrics are more comprehensive
"All children are morbid. It is their one saving grace."-- Truman Capote
If I'm not back in five minutes, wait longer. (Ace Ventura)
Kisses are like tears. The only ones that are real are the ones you can't hold back.
Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.-- Laurance J. Peter
If you don't know where you are going, you'll probably end up somewhere else.-- Laurence J. Peter
He who laughs last probably didn't understand the joke.
Psychiatry enables us to correct our faults by confessing our parents' shortcomings.-- Laurence J. Peter
What is dignity without honesty?-- Cicero
"To describe the beating of Egg Whites is almost as cheeky as advising how to lead a happy life."-- The Joy of Cooking
PHP is a minor evil perpetrated and created by incompetent amateurs, whereas Perl is a great and insidious evil, perpetrated by skilled but perverted professionals.-- Jon Ribbens
Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.-- Erica Jong
"Here's a horrible thought: You know how dumb the average person is? Well, half the human race is even dumber than that..."
Take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing: No one to blame.-- Erica Jong
Being entirely honest with oneself is a good exercise.-- Sigmund Freud
There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.
Why can't some people take a joke? Well, maybe because they're honest, and the joke doesn't belong to them.-- Matt Diamond
Experience is what causes a person to make new mistakes instead of old ones.
"...the only place for 63,000 bugs is a rain forest"