121 hits
"Before you go and criticize the younger generation, just remember who raised them."
Never underestimate the falseness of a generalisation.
In Taiwan, the translation of the Pepsi slogan "Come alive with the Pepsi Generation" came out as "Pepsi will bring your ancestors back from the dead."
"The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance."-- Robert R. Coveyou
Domestication is the enemy of romance.
Procrastination will rule one day, OK?
There are people so addicted to exaggeration that they can't tell the truth without lying.
"Patriotism is an arbitrary veneration of real estate above principles."-- George Jean Nathan
Machine learning, n: Automation of your biases
The skin of civilization is only 7 meals thick
2+2=5-ism: Caving in to a target marketing strategy aimed at oneself after holding out for a long period of time. "Oh, all right, I'll buy your stupid cola. Now leave me alone."-- Douglas Coupland ('Generation X')
America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual interval of civilization.-- Georges Clemenceau (1 December 1945)
2, 3, 3, 37 - the prime factorization of the beast.
"We are the flaming, exploding, CGI-movie saturated MTV generation after all. If it isn't bright pink and green, naked, on fire and computer animated, I just yawn and walk away." (Someone on Slashdot)
Sleep deprivation is fun -- you see such pretty colors.
355/113 -- Not the famous irrational number PI, but an incredible simulation.
Rule of Defactualization: Information deteriorates upward through bureaucracies.
Subduction leads to orogeny!
Selfish, adj.: Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.-- Ambrose Bierce
"Our generation has an incredible amount of realism, yet at the same time it loves to complain and not really change. Because, if it does change, then it won't have anything to complain about."-- Tori Amos
Fanfiction is just fixing things in post-post-production
"Men are more apt to be mistaken in their generalizations than in their particular observations."-- Machiavelli
Ad: Vacation special: Have your home exterminated. Get rid of aunts.
Proof by intimidation: 'Trivial'.
Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.
"Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell."
The revolution will NOT be televised.
Nothing is better than Sex.
Masturbation is better than nothing.
Therefore, Masturbation is better than Sex.
"To many, total abstinence is easier than perfect moderation."-- St. Augustine
Admiration: Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.-- Ambrose Bierce
Sometimes you have more perspective than the situation, sometimes the situation has more perspective than you.
"Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street."
"Exhilaration is that feeling you get just after a great idea hits you, and just before you realize what's wrong with it."
Lies, damned lies and user documentation.
"Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?"
It is practically impossible to teach good programming style to students that have had prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.-- Edsger Dijkstra
A great nation is any mob of people which produces at least one honest man a century.
Basing any to-be-correct life philosophy on one tiny alteration of your current life philosophy, that needed replacement as you've decided, is just bound to be a mistake.
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo.-- H. G. Wells
The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.-- Henry David Thoreau
Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.
"Whenever a separation is made between liberty and justice, neither, in my opinion, is safe."-- Edmund Burke
There has been opposition to every innovation in the history of man, with the possible exception of the sword.-- Benjamin Dana
"Conviction is a luxury for those on the sidelines."
Emacs is a good operating system, but I prefer Unix.
Insanity, a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.-- R. D. Lang
Rational, adj: Devoid of all delusions save those of observation, experience and reflection.-- Ambrose Bierce
The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand.
We listen to reply.
Love is like pi: natural, irrational and very important.-- Lisa Hoffman
Interpretation is the revenge of the intellect upon art.-- Susan Sontag
"I have learnt silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind; yet strange, I am ungrateful to these teachers."-- Kahlil Gibran
On applause: They named it Ovation from the Latin ovis, a sheep.-- Plutarch
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.-- H. L. Mencken
You do not understand hate. You do not hate *something*, you are full of hate or not full of hate. Generally, if you are not full of hate you are dumb. Generally, if you are full of hate you are also dumb. Generally, you are dumb.
"There comes a time in every man's education when he arrives at the conviction that envy is ignorance; that imitation is suicide."-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
Headline: Never Withhold Herpes Infection from Loved One
Begin somewhere; you cannot build a reputation on what you intend to do.-- Liz Smith
Christianity poisoned Eros, but Eros did not die, it merely degenerated into a vice.-- Friedrich Nietzsche
If men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament.
"Did I love her? I thought so. But from my new vantage point I realize that love is nothing more than a messy conglomoration of need, desperation, fear of death, insecurity about penis size, and the self-involved, ego-driven need to college other people's hearts." (Human Nature)
"Don't apply a Star Trek solution to a Babylon 5 problem."
"People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing.. that’s why we recommend it daily."
Reconsider, v: To seek a justification for a decision already made.-- Ambrose Bierce
Punctuation is important. There is a world of semantic difference between "Damn straight." and "Damn, straight."
Organized Religion is like Organized Crime; it preys on peoples' weakness, generates huge profits for its operators, and is almost impossible to eradicate.-- Mike Hermann
"There are very few personal problems that cannot be resolved by application of suitable quantities of duct tape."
"You can't depend on your judgment when your imagination is out of focus."-- Mark Twain
Pedaeration, n: Achieving the perfect body heat by having one leg under the sheet and one hanging off the edge of the bed.-- Rich Hall ("Sniglets")
The simple rights, the civil liberties from generations of struggle must not be just fine words for patriotic holidays, words we subvert on weekdays, but living, honored rules of conduct amongst us... I'm glad the American Civil Liberties Union gets indignant, and I hope this will always be so.-- Adlai Stevenson
Newton's Fourth Law: Every action has an equal and opposite satisfaction.
As long as the general population is passive, apathetic, diverted to consumerism or hatred of the vulnerable, then the powerful can do as they please, and those who survive will be left to contemplate the outcome.-- Noam Chomsky
Cashtration, n.: The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.
"You can tell the ideals of a nation by its advertisements."-- Norman Douglas
Arnold's First Law of Documentation
If it should exist, it doesn't.
Arnold's Second Law of Documentation
If it does exist, it's out of date.
Arnold's Third Law of Documentation
Only useless documentation transcends the first two laws.
"Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind."-- Terry Pratchett
When you don't have an education, you've got to use your brain.
"What are our schools for if not indoctrination against Communism?"-- Richard Nixon
"Documentation is the castor oil of programming. Managers know it must be good because the programmers hate it so much."
I do not think that any civilization can be called complete until it has progressed from sophistication to unsophistication, and made a conscious return to simplicity of thinking and living.-- Lin Yutang
The definition of easy work is work that someone else has to do.
I don't have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
Education... has produced a vast population able to read but unable to distinguish what is worth reading.-- G. M. Trevelyan
"The laws of probability, so true in general, so fallacious in particular."-- Edward Gibbon
Language and its absurd conjunctions;
Constellations and crustaceans rhyme.
"The best education consists in immunizing people against systematic attempts at education."-- Paul Karl Feyerabend
"You can best serve civilization by being against what usually passes for it."-- Wendell Berry
Quality Of Life: What an industrialized nation is said to offer when enough of its citizens are suffering from terminal stress. (Cynic's Dictionary)
After 16 years, MTV has finally completed its de-evolution into the shiny things network.-- The Onion
"We all suffer from the preoccupation that there exists ... in the loved one, perfection."-- Sidney Poitier
"Discretion is being able to raise your eyebrow instead of your voice."
Policeman: "You okay?"
Randolph: "I don't know, I'm sort of fucked up in general so it's hard to gauge" *faints* (Death to Smoochy)
I think the strangest (or, perhaps, at least the most inappropriate) conversation I've ever had during sex with anyone was a long discussion (punctuated by the obvious noises) of analytic means of setting a bound on the primality of generalised Fibonacci numbers.-- Kay Dekker
His lack of education is more than compensated for by his keenly developed moral bankruptcy.-- Woody Allen
Why shouldn't truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction after all has to make sense, right?
Imagine a world in which generations of human beings come to believe that certain films were made by God or that specific software was coded by him. Imagine a future in which millions of our descendants murder each other over rival interpretations of Star Wars or Windows 98. Could anything -- anything -- be more ridiculous? And yet, this would be no more ridiculous than the world we are living in.-- Sam Harris
"The man who has no tincture of philosophy goes through life imprisoned in the prejudices derived from common sense, from the habitual beliefs of his age or nation, and from convictions which have grown up in his mind without the co-operation or consent of his deliberate reason."-- Bertrand Russell
Education is a method whereby one acquires a higher grade of prejudices.-- Laurance J. Peter
Education is what you get when you read the fine print; experience is what you get when you don't.-- Pete Seeger
"Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee, and just as hard to sleep after."-- Anne Lindbergh
"The stone age was marked by man's clever use of crude tools; the information age, to date, has been marked by man's crude use of clever tools."
The future exists first in the imagination, then in the will, then in reality.
"People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for the freedom of thought which they seldom use."-- Kierkegaard
Do just once what others say you can't do,
and you will never pay attention to their limitations again.-- James R. Cook
Virtue is more to be feared than vice, because its excesses are not subject to the regulation of conscience.-- Adam Smith
Men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at. This determines not only the relations of men to women, but the relation of women to themselves.-- John Berger
PISCES (Feb 19 - Mar 20)
You have a vivid imagination and often think you are being followed by the CIA or FBI. You have minor influence over your associates, and people resent you for flaunting your power. You lack confidence and are generally a coward. Pisces people do terrible things to small animals.
"Question Authority. They usually know where the bathroom is."-- Daria