55 hits
Headline: Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
Men are like parking spaces: the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped.
There is no CyberSpace, just a lot of people pretending.-- Sam Kass
A age is called dark not because the light fails to shine, but because people refuse to see it.-- James Michener ("Space")
"News" is just the stuff they use to fill up all the empty space they couldn't sell for advertising.
"This space intentionally has nothing but text explaining why this space has nothing but text explaining that this space would otherwise have been left blank, and would otherwise have been left blank."
Since before the Earth was formed and before the sun burned hot in space, cosmic forces of inexorable power have been working relentlessly toward this moment in space-time -- you receiving this fortune.
There are no shortcuts to any place worth going.
Education, then, beyond all other devices of human origin, is the great machinery.-- Horace Mann
Given the pace of technology, I propose we leave math to the machines and go play outside. (Calvin & Hobbes)
"The world is a comedy to those who think, a tragedy to those who feel."-- Horace Walpole
A dark past creates a long path back to the surface.
"...the only place for 63,000 bugs is a rain forest"
On an American Airlines package of nuts: Instructions: Open package, eat nuts.
Private faces in public places /
Are wiser and nicer /
Than public faces in private places.-- W.H. Auden
Nine-tenths of the people were created so you would want to be with the other tenth.-- Horace Walpole
If I'm not back in five minutes, wait longer. (Ace Ventura)
"Hey, Aeryn's gorgeous--she can change any guy's tune. She can also change 'im from tenor to soprano, but that's beside the point."-- Grace
(After watching the movie, 2001: A Space Odyssey)
Isaac Asimov : "HAL's breaking First Law! He's breaking First Law!"
Carl Sagan : "So, strike them with lightning, Isaac."
Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft ... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.-- Wernher von Braun
Lunatic Asylum, n: The place where optimism most flourishes.
He was as shy as a newspaper is when referring to its own merits.
A real leader faces the music, even when he doesn't like the tune.
Work is a fine thing if it doesn't take too much of your spare time.
At any time, at any place, our snipers can drop you. Have a nice day.
Never underestimate the human capacity for cognitive dissonance.
Peace is not the absence of war. Peace is the presence of a system for resolving conflicts before war becomes necessary. War never creates peace.
"I always say it was great for God to send his only son, but I'm waiting for him to send his only daughter. Then things will be really great."-- Candace Pert
At a doctors office in Rome:
"Specialist in women and other diseases"
If the mind were exercised as much as the mouth, we would be a race of geniuses.
Additional: Our biggest enemy is going space crazy through loneliness. The only thing that helps me maintain my slender grip on reality is the friendship I share with my collection of singing potatoes.-- Holly (Red Dwarf II, Queeg)
The game of Monopoly is a lot like life, except you don't get $200 for going through a green light, and you don't drive a thimble. But wouldn't it be cool if you did?-- Craig Stacey
Language and its absurd conjunctions;
Constellations and crustaceans rhyme.
Mia Wallace: "Pretty smart."
Vincent Vega: "Yeah, I got my moments." (Pulp Fiction)
"Forget all those health clinics and gyms. Sex is the best cure for everything, especially stress. If I have a good night of sex, all my problems are gone by 10 o' clock in the morning."-- Grace Jones
Murphy's Pharmaceutcal Law:
Only Adults have difficulty with child-proof bottles.
Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.-- Paul Biron
Stand and fight, you misbegotten spawn of the perverse breeding between a pixie and a squirrel!
God has no place within these walls, just as facts have no place within organized religion.-- Homer Simpson
Ad from newspaper:
'Dinner Special--Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.'
Usenet is like a herd of performing elephants with diarrhea--massive, difficult to redirect, awe-inspiring, entertaining, and a source of mind-boggling amounts of excrement when you least expect it.-- Gene Spatford
Love me or hate me, but spare me your indifference.-- Libbie Fudim
Modern times are an awkward spectacle. On the one hand, our public selves compete for scarce window space, for the opportunity to see in and to where power is decided and used. On the other, private life recedes like a glacier, a translucent corner of heaven meant only to be photographed, never settled.-- Revel
I want to die like my grandfather, peaceful and in my sleep - not screaming like the other people in the car.
"All children are morbid. It is their one saving grace."-- Truman Capote