50 hits
When I was your age I...wait, I can't tell that story, it's wildly inappropriate. Which, oddly enough, is my point. Don't you want wildly inappropriate stories that you can't tell your children?-- Castle
"Like its politicians and its wars, society has the teenagers it deserves."-- J. B. Priestley
Never wrestle with a pig. You'll both get dirty, and the pig likes it.
My life has a superb cast but I can't figure out the plot.
-Ashleigh Brilliant
If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.-- Henry David Thoreau
Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
For an instant I think I saw. I saw the loneliness of man as a gigantic wave which had been frozen in front of me, held back by the invisible wall of a metaphor.-- Carlos Casteneda
Sexuality does not "turn on" at puberty and "turn off" at menopause. It is not a thing external, no matter how hard our culture teaches us to push it away. It is every bit as integral and fundamental the day you're born as it is the day you die.-- David Casti
"Documentation is the castor oil of programming. Managers know it must be good because the programmers hate it so much."
Everyone is entitled to my opinion.
What luck for the rulers that men do not think.-- Adolf Hitler
Procrastination will rule one day, OK?
In case of emergency, speak in cliches.
The voters have spoken, the bastards...
Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.
Remember: Silly is a state of Mind, Stupid is a way of Life.-- Dave Butler
We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act, but a habit.-- Aristotle
Work is a necessity for man. Man invented the alarm clock.-- Pablo Picasso
In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.
He who laughs last found the dirty meaning.
All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.-- Sean O'Casey
Headline: Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.-- Aristotle
A poet is someone who is astonished by everything.
Life is the art of drawing sufficient conclusions from insufficient premises.-- Samuel Butler
2, 3, 3, 37 - the prime factorization of the beast.
All animals except man know that the principal business of life is to enjoy it.-- Samuel Butler
A dark past creates a long path back to the surface.
"If Today Was a Fish, I'd Throw It Back In." (Song Title)
Headline: Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
Music soothes the savage beast. ...unless it's polka.
Isn't it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists?-- Kelvin Throop III
The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
The standard you walk past is the standard you accept.
There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it.-- Mary Little
He who laughs last probably didn't understand the joke.
In case of nuclear war, prayer in schools will be okay.
There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.
PROGRAM, n.: A magic spell cast over a computer allowing it to turn one's input into error messages. v. tr.: To engage in a pastime similar to banging one's head against a wall, but with fewer opportunities for reward.