41 hits
2, 3, 3, 37 - the prime factorization of the beast.
Music soothes the savage beast. ...unless it's polka.
"How else am I to get you to treat me like a man of weight and substance unless I act as morally perturbed and angst-ridden as everyone else in this room?"-- Beast (X-Men comic)
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
Christ: A man who was born at least 5,000 years ahead of his time.
The sun is like breasts - risky to look at unless you've got sunglasses.
The more we disagree, the bigger the chance that at least one of us is right.
A great nation is any mob of people which produces at least one honest man a century.
Be careful of the closeness of the signs lunch and lesbian. If you sign, "I'm hungry, let's eat lesbians", you should be sure that's what you meant.-- Steve Eastman
The goal of Computer Science is to build something that will last at least until we've finished building it.
"We need a president who's fluent in at least one language."-- Buck Henry
Schizophrenia beats being alone.
Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.-- Steven Wright
Choconiverous, adj: Biting off the head of the chocolate Easter bunny first.-- Rich Hall ("Sniglets")
Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.
Procrastination will rule one day, OK?
The voters have spoken, the bastards...
Pokemon (n), a Rastafarian proctologist.
"Theory: when you have ideas. Ideology: when ideas have you."
People often find it easier to be a result of the past than a cause of the future.
If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.-- Paul Beatty
Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.-- Oscar Wilde
He who laughs last found the dirty meaning.
Beauty lies in the hands of the beer holder.
Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes.
Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.
Every man is a damn fool for at least five minutes every day; wisdom consists of not exceeding the limit.-- Elbert Hubbard
Life is a sexually transmitted, fatal disease...
"Simple pleasures are the last refuge of the complex."-- Oscar Wilde
Love ceases to be a pleasure, when it ceases to be a secret.-- Aphra Behn
A poet is someone who is astonished by everything.
A dark past creates a long path back to the surface.
Headline: Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft
It will be generally found that those who sneer habitually at human nature and affect to despise it, are among its worst and least pleasant examples.-- Charles Dickens
The only substitute for good manners is fast reflexes.
Practice random kindness and senseless acts of beauty.
The standard you walk past is the standard you accept.
He who laughs last probably didn't understand the joke.
There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.
If a tree falls in a forest and lands on a politician, even if you can't hear the tree or the screams, I'll bet you'd at least hear the applause.-- Paul Tindale