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A man said to the universe, "Sir, I exist."
"However," replied the universe, "the fact has not created in me a sense of obligation."
-- Stephan Crane ("War is Kind," 1899)
"Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell."
-- Joan Crawford
Why does the universe go to all the bother of existing?
-- Stephen Hawking
If stupidity was a crime, honey, you'd get a life sentence.
-- Chris Stephenson
The elephant is the only mammal that can't jump.