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Watching these guys trying to be wireheads is like watching old people fuck
-- Mike Belt

All your base pairs are belong to us

Politics is storytelling. We just pick the one we like best.

I like being single. I'm always there when I need me.
-- Art Leo

Half of the people in the world are below average.

Ask not for whom the bell tolls, let the machine get it.

Science is the belief that we don't need belief to know most things.

Organic chemistry is the chemistry of carbon compounds.
Biochemistry is the study of carbon compounds that crawl.

-- Mike Adams

We're the technical experts. We were hired so that management could ignore our recommendations and tell us how to do our jobs.
-- Mike Andrews (a.s.r.)

The sun is like breasts - risky to look at unless you've got sunglasses.

Doubt your beliefs and believe your doubts.

"I like butter and the people who like butter."
-- Tori Amos (Dew Drop In Tour, June 12, 1996)

Organized Religion is like Organized Crime; it preys on peoples' weakness, generates huge profits for its operators, and is almost impossible to eradicate.
-- Mike Hermann

"Geologists know how to make the bedrock."

Work like you don't need the money
Love like you've never been hurt
Fuck like you're being filmed

He believes in the fine arts with all the earnestness of a man who does not understand them.
-- George Bernard Shaw

Beauty lies in the hands of the beer holder.

"I like to go to the beach and bury metal objects that say 'get a life' on them"

Natural vs. unnatural is a pretty worthless distinction.
-- Greg Parkinson
Only to someone such as yourself, with a deliberate disability to perceive the difference.
-- Bob Sarver
But easy for someone like you, who can manufacture the difference on the spot.

-- Mike Batchelor

"All great truths begin as blasphemies."
-- George Bernard Shaw

"Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of."

Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.

A bird in the hand is the best way to eat chicken.

Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.

2, 3, 3, 37 - the prime factorization of the beast.

I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation.
-- George Bernard Shaw