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"I am not a Marxist."
-- Karl Marx

My karma ran over my dogma.

"It's a strange thing, but every sentient race has its own version of these Swedish meatballs. I suspect it's one of those great universal mysteries which will either never be explained or which would drive you mad if you ever learned the truth."
-- G'Kar (Babylon 5)

Psychoanalysis is the mental illness it purports to cure.
-- Karl Kraus

I know Karate, Kung Fu, and 47 other dangerous words.

"The secret of the demagogue is to make himself as stupid as his audience so that they will believe they are as clever as he."
-- Karl Kraus

"There are things that are so serious that you can only joke about them."
-- Werner Karl Heisenberg

"The best education consists in immunizing people against systematic attempts at education."
-- Paul Karl Feyerabend

Proof by eminent authority: I saw Karp in the elevator and he said it was probably NP-complete.