20 hits
Remember: Silly is a state of Mind, Stupid is a way of Life.-- Dave Butler
All animals except man know that the principal business of life is to enjoy it.-- Samuel Butler
Life is the art of drawing sufficient conclusions from insufficient premises.-- Samuel Butler
"There is a fine line between 'hobby' and 'mental illness'."-- Dave Barry
A sense of humor keen enough to show a man his own absurdities will keep him from the commission of all sins, or nearly all, save those that are worth committing.-- Samuel Butler
I used to get high on life, but I've built up a tolerance.
"Advertising may be described as the science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get money from it."-- Stephen Butler Leacock
"I don't know what caffeine does for you, but I'm pretty sure without it your head caves in"-- Dave (News Radio)
"Jacob Sullum has produced a thoughtful, sane, and logical analysis of our drug laws. Is that even legal?"-- Dave Barry
It's been lovely, but I have to scream now.
QoS means I don't have enough bandwidth, but if you pay me extra money I'll drop someone else's packets instead of yours.-- Dave Rand
I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.-- Dave Edison
Say what you like about me, but sometimes I wish that I were really rich and didn't have to work. And also handsome.-- Dave George
When I heated my home with oil, I used an average of 800 gallons a year. I have found that I can keep comfortably warm for an entire winter with slightly over half that quantity of beer.-- Dave Barry
I think if you really like a girl you have to pay a lot of attention to her. But try telling that to those jerks on the jury.-- Dave George
"Buying the right computer and getting it to work properly is no more complicated than building a nuclear reactor from wristwatch parts in a darkened room using only your teeth."-- Dave Barry
There are multitudes in me. But not if I have to behave.
There is no snooze button on a cat who wants breakfast.
I used to have an internal modem, but it made me walk funny.
My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.