"I am the very master of the multipurpose metaphor;
I put them into speeches which I always feel the better for.
The speed of my delivery is totally vehicular;
I'm burning with a passion about nothing in particular.
I'm well acquainted too with matters technological;
I'm able to explain myself in phrases tautological.
My language is poetical and full of hidden promises . . .
It's like the raging torrent of a thousand Dylan Thomases".-- Alistair Beaton