randomsearchproposestats
19 hits
Hi, this is Peter. Right now alien creatures are eating my brain. Please leave a message at the tone and when they are finished one of the alien creatures will assume my form and get back to you.
-- Peter da Silva (heard occasionally on his answering machine)

Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will pick himself up and continue on.
-- Winston Churchill

'Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible.'
-- Lord Kelvin (President, Royal Society, 1895)

Keep emotionally active. Cater to your favorite neurosis.

Ask not for whom the bell tolls, let the machine get it.

A mathematician is a machine for converting coffee into theorems.

Eheu, horsum venit vir qui fert locustas!
[Uh-oh, here comes the lobster man!]

('Latin For Even More Occasions')

On two occasions I have been asked, ‘Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?’ I am not able rightly to apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.
-- Charles Babbage

The effort of using machines to mimic the human mind has always struck me as rather silly. I would rather use them to mimic something better.
-- Edsger Dijkstra

Feature, n: A surprising property of a program. Occasionally documented. To call a property a feature sometimes means the author did not consider that case, and the program makes an unexpected, though not necessarily wrong response. See BUG. ``That's not a bug, it's a feature!'' A bug can be changed to a feature by documenting it.

Piety, n: Reverence for the Supreme Being, based on His supposed resemblance to man.

Machine learning, n: Automation of your biases

On an occasion of this kind it becomes more than a moral duty to speak one's mind. It becomes a pleasure.
-- Oscar Wilde

I have a 3 year old. He'll have filtering software on his machine until he's at least thirteen or until he figures out how to disable it. If he's savvy enough to outgeek his dad who's been geeking for over 20 years more than him, then he deserves his porn.
-- Alex Johns

Given the pace of technology, I propose we leave math to the machines and go play outside.
(Calvin & Hobbes)

Lost: gray and white female cat. Answers to electric can opener.

"Complex problems have simple, easy to understand wrong answers."

Education, then, beyond all other devices of human origin, is the great machinery.
-- Horace Mann