randomsearchproposestats
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The hypothalamus is one of the most important parts of the brain, involved in many kinds of motivation. The hypothalamus controls the "Four F's": 1. fighting; 2. fleeing; 3. feeding; and 4. mating.
-- Psychology professor (in neuropsychology intro course)
"...Yes, the lectures are optional. Graduation is also optional."
-- Professor Brian Quinn
A professor is one who talks in someone else's sleep.
A wolf in sheeps clothing needs professional help.
When you have to deal with the god-awful instruction set of the X86, you may as well get paid.
-- ECE/CS 552 Professor Mark Hill (explaining why we would be studying the MIPS architecture instead.)
Lecture, n: Where the notes of the professor become the notes of the student without passing through the mind of either one.
(as The Spice Girls play in background)
"What are they doing?"
"Psychological warfare."
(Small Soldiers)
"Our American professors like their literature clear, cold, pure and very dead."
-- Sinclair Lewis
Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau.
-- Irving Fisher (Professor of Economics, Yale University, 1929.)
"Professor Plum, you were once a professor in Psychiatry, specializing in helping paranoid and homocidal lunatics suffering from delusions of grandeur."
"Yes, but now I work for the United Nations."
"So, your work has not changed..."
(Clue)
You can be a professional without being constipated about it.
-- David Keyser
Equality is not when a female Einstein gets promoted to assistant professor; equality is when a female schlemiel moves ahead as fast as a male schlemiel.
-- Ewald Nyquist