48 hits
Every human being is capable of everything, no matter how exalted or depraved. Without twenty years of diligent domestication, it is in our nature to commit genocide, infanticide, and canabillism. And drink beer and howl at the moon.-- Donna Barr ("Desert Peach: the Good Uncle")
Only the good die young. Note the average age in Congress.
Men are like parking spaces: the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped.
"One good turn gets most of the blankets"
"Remember the Golden Rule: Those who have the gold make the rules."
Decafalon, n.: The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
"Men are like pumpkins. It seems like all the good ones are either taken or they've had everything scraped out of their heads with a spoon."
It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better... while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.-- Woody Allen
The good critic is he who narrates the adventures of his soul among masterpieces.-- Anatole France
Advisor: The guy who told you how to screw up.
I once listed all the good things I did over the past year, and then turned them into resolution form and backdated them. That was a good feeling.-- Robert Fulghum
"No man chooses evil because it is evil;
he only mistakes it for happiness, the good he seeks."-- Mary Wollstonecraft
The goodness of morals depends upon what the morals say, not just the fact that they are morals.-- Rob Bernardo
“Love is a drug. It really is. I don’t care who you are, if you’ve got a line on the good stuff, the real stuff that isn’t full of crap, it consumes you. You become it.”-- Amanda Firefox
Good sex is like good bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.-- Mae West
When I look around I think this, this is good enough. And I try to laugh at whatever life brings.
Cuz when I look down I just miss all the good stuff and when I look up I just trip over things.-- Ani Difranco
Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
Be good to your friends, or they may develop psychokinetic powers and destroy Tokyo.
"Documentation is the castor oil of programming. Managers know it must be good because the programmers hate it so much."
The value of the Constitution depends on the good will of government itself. If the Supreme Court rules that the Bill of Rights should not interfere with the important business of government (which they have done on at least two occasions), then the Constitution is meaningless.-- John Kormylo
Television: the bland leading the bland.
A good pun is its own reword.
Don't try to be different. Just be good. To be good is different enough.-- Arthur Freed
A trial is a lot like gladiator combat. Except trials don't feature half-naked men in armor with swords and spears and those ball thingies at the ends of ropes. Well, okay -- the good trials do, but it doesn't happen often enough, if you ask me.-- Jonathan Colan
PMS, n: the short period of time when women act like men do all the time.
It is a good thing to in your mind be able to seperate the artist from the art.
Accuracy, n: The vice of being right.
We accept the love we think we deserve
"Greek mythology says that whom the gods would destroy, they first make mad. I'd never been sure whether 'mad' meant crazy or angry. Either way, the gods were working on me pretty good right now."-- Darien Fawkes (The Invisible Man)
Practical philosophy: The glass is neither half empty nor half full. It is twice as large as it needs to be.
Law of diminishing IQ:
The IQ of the group is the lowest IQ of a member of the group divided by the number of people in the group.
"On the whole human beings want to be good, but not too good and not quite all the time."-- George Orwell
Aftermath, n: The period following algebra.
Anything is good if it's made of chocolate.
Q: Why did the germ cross the microscope?
A: To get to the other slide.
The problem isn't that the victim can't fight, the problem is that they have to. Saying that self-defense classes are the answer to gay bashers is like saying that it would be good if the government stopped prosecuting rape cases and used the money saved to hand out free mace.-- Richard Caley
Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off the goal.-- Hannah More
Thinking: The talking of the soul with itself.-- Plato
Quantum mechanics: The dreams stuff is made of.